What Are Intrusive Thoughts?
- lourdes Ibarra, LPC, MC.

- Jul 15
- 3 min read
Updated: Sep 6

Intrusive Thoughts: They’re More Than Just Unwanted
You’ve probably heard the phrase “intrusive thoughts” pop up on social media. It’s become a bit of a buzzword, but as a counselor, I work with this every day. I can tell you there’s a lot more to it than what you might hear in a short video or post.
Definition of Intrusive Thoughts
“Unwanted involuntary thoughts, images, or urges that pop into your mind and can feel disturbing, distressing, or completely out of character. They are often repetitive and can be hard to ignore or control.”
Here are five key traits of intrusive thoughts:
Unwanted
Distressing
Ego-dystonic (goes against your values)
Common
Harmless (in most cases)
Are They Always “Unwanted”?
Technically, yes. Nobody wants intrusive thoughts. However, in therapy, I often see that these thoughts can become so familiar that people don’t even recognize them for what they are. Sometimes, they blend into the background so well that they go unnoticed for years.
In some cases, they can even feel comforting. Not because they’re positive, but because they provide a sense of control or help explain the world. So yes, they’re “unwanted,” but that awareness often comes after something shifts, like stress, loss, or just becoming more self-aware.
Distressing? Yes... But It Is Not Always Obvious
Sometimes, the distress doesn’t scream at you. It creeps in quietly, and you adapt to it. You might feel anxious, tense, or on edge, but it’s become your “normal,” so you don’t notice just how much it’s wearing you down.
For some people, even that stress becomes weirdly familiar. It’s what they’ve known. Recognizing this pattern is the first step toward understanding the impact of intrusive thoughts.
The “Ego-Dystonic” Part Is Complicated
This term means the thought goes against your core values or who you believe you are. The truth is, our values are shaped by many factors: upbringing, trauma, culture, and family dynamics. Sometimes, those intrusive thoughts are tied to unspoken beliefs or painful experiences that haven’t been fully worked through.
They’re Common
Most people experience intrusive thoughts from time to time. That’s completely normal. Many may or may not realize they have them. Understanding that these thoughts are common can help reduce feelings of isolation or shame.
Harmless?
Intrusive thoughts can be misleading. They often stem from emotional pain, inner conflict, or unprocessed experiences. They’re not necessarily random, although it may seem like it. When they linger, they can hurt your sense of safety, self-worth, or peace of mind.
Our brains process emotional pain similarly to physical pain. Whether it’s verbal abuse, rejection, or deep shame, it can be registered in your brain just as harmful as physical pain. Recognizing this connection is crucial for healing.
So What Do We Do About It?
If you’re noticing thoughts that feel intrusive, repetitive, or unsettling, therapy can help you figure out where they’re coming from and how they’re showing up in your life.
You don’t have to untangle it all on your own. If this sounds familiar, or if you’re ready to understand what’s going on under the surface, feel free to reach out or book a consultation. Therapy is a safe space to explore all the parts of you, including the ones you don’t talk about often.
The Importance of Seeking Help
Seeking help is a vital step in managing intrusive thoughts. Many people hesitate to reach out, thinking they can handle it alone. However, talking to a professional can provide clarity and support. A therapist can guide you through your feelings and help you develop coping strategies.
Coping Strategies for Intrusive Thoughts
Here are some effective coping strategies you can try:
Mindfulness: Practice being present in the moment. This can help you detach from intrusive thoughts.
Journaling: Write down your thoughts. This can help you process them and understand their origins.
Grounding Techniques: Use grounding exercises to bring your focus back to the present.
Talk to Someone: Sharing your thoughts with a trusted friend or therapist can be incredibly beneficial.
Conclusion
Intrusive thoughts are more than just unwanted distractions. They can reveal deeper issues that need addressing. Understanding their nature and impact is the first step toward healing. Remember, you don’t have to face this alone.
If you’re ready to take the next step, reach out at Creating Meaning Counseling



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